I don’t even know where to begin. Maybe from the countless conversations I’ve had with men where I went in with a serious heart ❤️, marriage on my mind 💍. Or maybe from the point where I slowly started falling out with the very idea of it…

My mother and sister worry 😔. They just want me “settled,” they want me married so that I won’t end up alone. And maybe you’ll say, isn’t that what most families want? But tell me honestly isn’t it better to be alone than to be with someone who makes you feel like you don’t even belong? 🌙

It’s not like I haven’t tried. I really have. I’ve spoken to men with different age groups, castes, cities. But what do you do when most of them turn out the same? Some only wanted hook-ups while I was talking about building a life. Some wanted marriage, but without moving a single inch in their own lives as if only the wife is supposed to adjust. Some insulted me simply because I dared to say no. And some… some couldn’t even respect the fact that a woman was giving them her time ⏳. Instead, they flaunted it like a trophy.

And then comes the script 🎭: You’re so caring, you’re so thoughtful, you’re so beautiful, you’re so strong, you’re so responsible… Nice words, right? But not to truly appreciate me. No, just to butter me up so I’d marry them and keep doing everything they demand. But tell me when do I get the chance to say the same about them? And frankly speaking it’s are fault that we do not want to see beyond this manipulative, deceitful nature, we get carried away with whatever they are presenting and think it is true.

Till now I haven’t seen a man who create a safe and comfortable environment for me instead they keep expecting me to adjust because they are too egoistic to adjust. Where is the one man who says: If you want to fall, fall – I’ll catch you. When you’re tired of being strong, I’ll be strong for you. When you want to cry, I’ll listen. When you need rest, I’ll take care of things. Isn’t that what marriage is supposed to be? Two people holding each other up? 🤝

Instead, what I get are endless conditions: Wear this after marriage. Your mother will live with us after marriage? Let me talk to my parents as this will be a very big change for us, not sure if we are comfortable and for women it is very easy to change their cities even countries, own house, own space and accept it with their whole heart. I won’t change my location. I want a live-in first. You’ll have to take care of my parents. Oh, you’re Manglik? Let me think. But why should I? Why should I take care of theirs when they don’t even respect mine? And then they expect me to leave my mother for them. That person who stood with me not only at my highest but to my lowest phase of life, who care for me so deeply and get tensed when she have to leave me alone while visiting my sister.

I still remember one incident from my early days. A parent once called my mom and said: “Your daughter will have to leave her career and location and come live with us. And since she doesn’t have a father, we’ll get the marriage done with less money.” Do you know how much their son was earning at 38? ₹9 lakhs a year. Way less than what I was earning three years ago. He could barely take care of himself, let alone me. And yet the audacity was sky-high 🤯 reducing my entire life to a cheap bargain. Can you even imagine hearing that about yourself?

And the expectations don’t stop there. Candidates and their parents want a daughter-in-law like Parvati, Sati, Sita, Lakshmi, Radha, Rukmini. But tell me, are their sons even 0.01% like Krishna, Mahadev, Ram, Vishnu? Are their families giving respect like those divine families did? Because last I checked, too many women are still treated like transactions, commodities, maids, cooks, nurses and when they’re no longer “useful,” they’re beaten, burned, forgotten. 🔥

And these people call themselves modern? Seriously? I refuse to even call them human, Sorry, not sorry.

What shocks me even more is that this comes from the so-called “educated” section of our country. Honestly, by the standards of our ancestors or even the gods they worship, they are not even 0.001% educated. The real tragedy is the environment they’ve created: one where the parents of girls, the very people who bless them with their own Lakshmi, who will extend their family line are demeaned and belittled. They fail to understand that it is because of Prakriti that we all possess body, mind and soul. Actually not only us but it helped Brahma, Vishnu, Mahesh to possess body, mind and soul. Without Prakriti all that would remain is nothing but Ash.

A girl doesn’t need anyone to make her life complete; she is Prakriti herself whole, self-sufficient, the very force that creates the entire Bhoomi. It is the boy and his family who need her to extend their lineage, and yet they treat her with contempt. Many don’t even grasp the essence of Kanyadan believing the receiver is greater than the giver.

I still remember the story of King Janak giving Sita’s hand to King Dashrath. Janak folded his hands and said, “I am giving my gem to you; please take care of her.” Dashrath replied, “Why do you fold your hands? You are the one giving; we are only receiving. We bow to you.” That was respect, culture, humanity. 🙏 Not demeaning someone just because they are the parents of a girl. Dashrath didn’t just speak; he honored Janak’s daughter in his actions, treating her as his own.

Marriage used to be my childhood dream 🌸. I thought I’d give up anything for it even my career. But life has a way of teaching you, doesn’t it? And I learned the hard way. At my lowest, when I thought nothing could hold me, it wasn’t a man who saved me. It was my career. My work became my strength, my anchor. It reminded me: giving up my dreams, my independence, my identity – it’s not worth it. Not for anyone.

And yet people think you can just “move on.” But tell me have you ever moved on from something that scarred your soul? From something that made you lose trust in even your own shadow? 👥 I want to believe in people, I really do. But these so-called men keep proving me right, again and again. They ask, “Am I important to you?” And honestly? I laugh. Because not once did they make me feel important. Importance isn’t something you beg for with words, it’s something you show with actions. Don’t you agree?

Let’s be real too many men want a wife without being a partner. 🚫 They demand sacrifice, obedience and compromise but bring zero respect to the table. Tell me why should I give up my worth just to wear a ring? Marriage without respect isn’t love, it’s slavery disguised as tradition💔

So no I won’t settle. I won’t marry just to tick a box on society’s checklist. I won’t trade my dignity for a ring. 💍 I want someone who sees my worth, who values it, who adds to it instead of draining it.

So if you ask me, is marriage worth considering without respect? My answer is no. A loud, unapologetic, unshaken NO. 🚫 I’d rather walk alone with dignity than be chained to someone who doesn’t value me. 🌹

And just maybe one day it will all make sense. 💫 Maybe someday there will be someone who knows that love without respect is hollow and that when respect dies even love eventually fades. What’s left then is only bitterness, regret and a wounded self-worth. 🌙

Until that day comes, I’ll keep choosing myself, again and again. 🌸